i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize