Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize