some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
