I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
