3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I love having hate sex.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Randomize
