I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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