And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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