People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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