Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
