You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
