Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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