Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
