can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
