yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
how does that bad decision feel?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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