I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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