Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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