if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
