I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
