I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just high enough for therapy.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
