well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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