You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
