If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize