He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Randomize
