Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
