is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You are a genius and a whore.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
