I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
