She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize