please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
