Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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