I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I just want nice things and good sex
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize