Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
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