Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
