is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Randomize