I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
