Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
the day after is always just damage control
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
