Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize
