don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
