Your tits are I can't wait for
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
