I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
