I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
