Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize