Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
