Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
