i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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