I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
