She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Randomize