im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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