My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
