im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
