Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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